mommy dearest

went out with my mommy today for a bit. not hung out with her for a loooong time. hee... for those of you who don't know my mom, she's the Blur Queen. i have no idea how my dad could have put up with her idiosyncrasies and ignorances for all these years... it's sooo bad.. i could ask her to take a photo for me, position the camera such that i've centralised the shot and all she has to do is look at it, keep the camera still, wait for me to stand in position and press the button... but she couldn't even do that.. not once, no, but twice in a row. like this photo for example...(this was the 2nd attempt)

that's my mom for you.
and that time when the girlies came to sleep over, we asked her to help us take a photo... this is what she took:

even after i told her not miss out the words on the table...
mom:what words?
this was what was on the table..

and let's not forget the time she lost me in ikea and she had to use her handphone to call me.. yeah. she had to ask the ikea salesman to unlock her phone for her.. oh oh.. and the countless number of times we went swimming in the evenings and she'd start talking non-stop to some stranger standing next to her in the pool, thinking it was me.. even when the person was a guy. and the fact that she's been pronouncing 'film' as 'flim' and 'confiscate' as 'confisicate' for the past 21 years i've known her, despite the fact that i always correct her..

and she allllwaaaays never fails to say the silliest things.. like today in the car while i was driving us home.. i was wearing a white collared short sleeve shirt with a vest over it.

me: whaaaa... i'm damn hot!
mom: here, here, i give you all my aircon.. (turns the aircon towards me) who ask you go and wear so many layers? singapore is so hot, the girls all wear g-strings. ...


or over dinner,

mom: who you going to play badminton with?
me: some old friends. (i had said this at least 3 times already.)
mom: where?
me: queen astrid park
mom: with who?
me:...
mom: but you don't know how to play badminton! .....-3 secs-....oh
(i've been in national training since i was 11)

and how she always nags at me...

MAAY LING! (note the emphasis on the 'mei'.. that is for getting my attention.) no no! don't take the car! i don't allow you to drive my car!

or when she tries to cajole me...

MEI LEEEEENG... (this time the emphasis on the 'ling'. it's supposed to sound more endearing.) why you always going out? stay at home la you...why you never spend time with your familee?

yup yup.. that's my mom for you.

haha.. but i still love her very very much.. heh. but honestly.. sometimes i don't know whether to laugh or to cry... i'm so glad blurness isn't hereditary.. or is it?